So, Brent and I were scheming last night. We were talking about how we are going to be living together as single men for the rest of our lives unless drastic measures are taken. We came up with a full proof way to get wives. Here it is...
See our other roommate, Brian Klontz, Brent's brother, is a complete and total ladies man. I don't mean that as an insult, he just is. He isn't out like, "playing the field" or "hooking up with chicks" he just has something that girls want. I don't know what it is, but chicks just melt when they are around him. We'll put it this way; Brian is doing all the dating that Brent and I aren't. He evens out the balance of the universe of dating. Brent + Me = 0 dates. Brian = about 1 million.
Anyways, here's our plan...
Brent and I are going to do everything that we can to get Brian married as soon as humanly possible. Why? So we can kick him out of our house, he owns another one, and get some new roommates. Only this time, we will get God fearing ladies as roommates. Brian's room is big enough to share, so two of them will fit nicely. Then we will proceed to merely, "hang out" as roommates do. Watching movies, having dinner, etc. Every single night will be just like a date. Only we don't have to take the girls home, because they are already there! Then after a while and the ladies fall in love with us, we will marry them and they will bear our children.
Foolproof plan. I don't see any flaws at all. It's perfect.
Now we just need some Christian ladies to volunteer, any takers?
13 comments:
LOL! Thats hillarious. I love it. I also recommend reading "A Young Man's Guide to Hunting Foxes"
WOW!! Great plan, but if you two end up marrying these gals, are you all going to be roommates still? Oh, I got a suggestion. Sisters - Twin sisters!
Hehe, there is no problem with you reading it as a girl. Getting him married, gets him out of the house.
Didn't I say that?
JJ -
I'm COMPLETELY in cahoots with ya! All you gotta do is get him married, and there will be enough "availability slots" available for you and Brent to fill.
Hmmm. Not sure I should comment as I really think I should leave the both of you too your evil scheming. Though...it is actually very, very funny topic. Yes, Brian is a rather charming fellow, so you could probably get him married off if in dire need. However, you are both guys and so it will still be up to you to find someone you like and pursue. I am sure that no girl you would want to marry would openly move in with any guys however and so I wish you the best of luck.
mwuahahahahahahahahahahaha
JJ, I laughed almost the whole way through this blog. I don't know why you had to mention that it was partly my idea though . . . I would never think of an idea like that . . . (while silently muttering Casey's mwuahahahahahahahahahahaha).
Um...did I mention that you are all insanely crazy? Like any girl would ever fall for that...more likely they would be appalled. Obviously guys do NOT understand the female mind. Like Hannah said, "Your plan is fool hardy, riddled with danger, and doomed to failure!!!." There you have it.
"Love is a many splendid thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love." -- Ewan McGreggor =)
Man I really struck a chord on this one. I should write more blogs like this. Stir the pot, mix it up.
Just in case anyone didn't notice, this was Brent's idea too, maybe you should go chastise him too! (sarcasm implied)
I know. I was sure Brent was involved. That sort of thing would be just too much like him. ;) (That's right, Brent. I see right through your cute facade.)
they're obviously busy adjusting to the newfound ladies...
lol.
reminds me of a certain Five Iron Frenzy scheme I heard about in junior high... only different...
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